Think Twice, Speak Once:

I must admit I've been critical towards people both quietly and aloud. It came easily in my youth, feeling normal because I witnessed many who freely judged others. Then, life happened, revealing the results of my poor decisions. Unfortunately, I learned as you walk through life's storms you are not spared judgement. Experiencing the humility of teen pregnancy opened my eyes to judgement and criticism. While judgement was hurtful, I also discovered goodness and mercy! I discovered there were genuine loving and compassionate people. Those who were compassionate and non-judgmental were not forgotten. One was a schoolteacher (Mrs. Eaves) and the other was my OB/GYN staff. They treated me with dignity and respect. I wanted to extend this to others as I became aware of the impact of mercy and compassion. "This is what the Lord Almighty said: ‘Administer true justice; show mercy and compassion to one another. Zechariah 7:9 NIV

I knew more mistakes would come; we are a fallen world. I knew I would need future mercy, so I needed to extend it! I remembered the law of sowing and reaping, it is written, Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. Galatians 6:7 NIV. I don't walk in this perfectly, but I am further than I used to be. In the medical field there are frequent occasions presented to pass judgment. As a medical professional I noticed I asked myself questions (why, what, how). I knew deep inside it was not for me to ask or know. I was there to care for patients in their time of need. Not all, but people suffer physical consequences to their health choices. As a nurse, it was of utmost importance, to extend the same compassion I received as an expecting teen mom. Called to Blessing 8 Finally, all of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another; love as brothers, be tenderhearted, be [a]courteous; 9 not returning evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary blessing, knowing that you were called to this, that you may inherit a blessing. 1 Peter 3:8-9 NKJV

What about everyday life? Just look on social media and questions begin to stir. From the comfort of your favorite chair, you have an open window into the lives of others. Social media hosts a gargantuan amount of exposure to people and current events. Statistics say more than half of the world now uses social media. The average daily time spent using social media is just over 2 hours. We all struggle, and social media disperses information into our hands at lightning speed. Next time, before you are tempted to be critical ask yourself these questions.

Do you really know the person? Do you know the full story? Do you know how they were raised? Do you know the setbacks, devastation, or tragedies they faced? Do you suppose they have the same family support as you? Do you suppose they have the same support group as you? Did you think they may be alone? Do you know the struggle it took for them to get out of bed? Do you know the struggle it took to perform simple tasks (bathing, eating, or getting dressed)?

Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain but it takes character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving. Dale Carnegie

Also, constructive criticism and telling someone the truth is not the same as being judgmental.

A Simple Guide for Behavior

“Don’t pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults—unless, of course, you want the same treatment. That critical spirit has a way of boomeranging. It’s easy to see a smudge on your neighbor’s face and be oblivious to the ugly sneer on your own. Do you have the nerve to say, ‘Let me wash your face for you,’ when your own face is distorted by contempt? It’s this whole traveling road-show mentality all over again, playing a holier-than-thou part instead of just living your part. Wipe that ugly sneer off your own face, and you might be fit to offer a washcloth to your neighbor. Matthew 7:1-5 MSG